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Niccolo's Revenge
http://forum.nzwargamer.net/viewtopic.php?f=32&t=12477
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Author:  tilman [ Fri Jun 19, 2015 4:59 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Niccolo's Revenge

IL GIORNO
SCRIBERE LA VERA VERITA

(TRANSLATED OVERSEAS VERSION)

ARTE
The good Augustin“Michalangelo” de Medici has sponsored another artistic exhibition on the Ponte Veccio. To the great joy of the general public some Spies from Milan have been beheaded, their blood forming complex Paterns in the river. There was great joy throughout and Augustin has promissed the next Happening to be even more spectacular, eventualy adding some blue blood. We are impressed.

FAITH
There has been a congregation of the major cardinals that have sanctioned the League of the holy Trinity, that has been duly formed by all good Italians in good faith to fend of any "Protection". The Pope has given his approval.
Heads of noble families are invited to apply to this newspaper to get a full information package of the terms, discounts and advantages that come with the membership. Applications before 1st of July get 5 % Discount. (ADVERTISEMENT).

MILITARIA
It has come to the notice of the the interested Public that there has been some troop movement in our beloved country.
A marginal Newspaper, (usually well informed circles have leaked it is in the pay of some dubious Character outside of our beloved Italia but nevertheless seeing himself as our Master), has interviewed a harmless peasant with questionable mathematical capabilities to stir up unrest in the north. It seems as this foreign "Master" tries to get our noble families to cut each others throat, where there should be peace and trade in Italy. He has obviously found some resonance, as no doubt the self enthroned Brent “le Empereur” Visconti drags together all his 6 rag-tag companies to "protect" the rest of Italy. The Doge of Venice has given an interview that he is only waiting for the end of the current trading season to fully mobilize all his loyal Eagle knights, a shipload of Obsidian has arrived and is shaprened in the Arsenal. Brian “the cunning” Borgia (just back from the field of Honour in Mohacs) said that he does not care who protects the pope as long as its a Borgia. Kerry “the swarthy” Toledo has given an interview, but it was in Spanish, so we cannot print it here. Dave"The Puppeteer" Petrucci is away caring for some affairs in Britain as we have been informed by his Palace, we hope him to be back soon to see for the sienese politics before the usual unrest sets in with those "democrats". As we have got to know over our information network, EStuardo D'este “the mexican” is still getting some heretic lessons in a Place called "The white Mountain" by the wise TilTheManWhoWalks, but we have been told he will be soon back sobered about his military capabilities and better trained to defend his home city. Dang “the Grim” Grimaldi is guarding the border of our fatherland against the cunning French as usual, so we can all do our just trade and said he will fight to the last mercenary to defend our noble families holy self government and freedom.

LOCAL
A Pig Farm in Soresina has been burned down. Pietro the Pig farmer arrested for insurance fraud.

POLITICS
A bag of Rice has been toppled over by an Italian Poloplayer in Bejing.

EDUCATION
3 Teachers of jousting have been hanged in Milan for not being capable of teaching a local nobleman the right end to hold the the lance.
Vacancies
Jousting Teachers sought after in Milan, apply at the Palace of Brent Visconti.

SPORTS
Overseas Team of Portugal has reached the Final in the U20 Fotbol in a land with a long cloud behind the rainbow. Playing the Serbs who are said to play the orthodox way.

Author:  awesum4 [ Tue Jun 23, 2015 11:24 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Niccolo's Revenge

Dire la Verita

[b]20th April 1498
[/b]


Shortages of Supplies Slammed

Claims that there is a chronic shortage of supplies throughout the peninsula, due to the large number of towns being fortified, have been slammed by Geraldo Bruinlee the Minister of Fortifications, Trenches, Aqueducts, Roads, Bridges, Sewers, Pipework in General and all Masonary structures in Bari. "There is no shortages, merely an inability of some individuals to count beyond five, and a tendency to hoard amongst certain parties. The system will work and by early summer at the last there will be piles of stone and timber throughout this beautiful country of ours". Meanwhile in Florence Sebastion de Vauban the leading French Military Engineer and Fashionista declared "How can these paisans expect me to create works of genius with these second rate materials. Look at this stone, its all so "Grey" and look at this timber its all so "Beige"



Unrest in Genoa

The orders of Duke Dang "the Grim" to reorganize the Genoese Forces in the Modern "Allemain" Style have lead to unrest in some quarters. Pieter the Pikeman, the newly appointed Captain of the 3rd Company of the Duke's Own Foot said "Some find the Glockenspeil concerts are a bit of a drag and would rather return to our traditional drunken brawls and whoring. But I reckon it much better than slopping out the pigs back home, and the Duke is a great bloke. I really love the big blonde girls in the metal breastplates singing opera"


War in the South

The Prince of Rome, Brian "the cunning" Borgia, has declared war on his neighbor David "the puppeteer " Petrucci. Apparently the cause of the conflict was David's failure to ravish Brian's nubile daughter Lucretia when she was trapped by rising floodwaters in David's hunting lodge on the outskirts of Orivetio. "This blatant disregard for the traditions of our land cannot go unanswered and must be wiped clean by large quantities of Siennese blood" thundered Prince Brian. Duke David's reply that he thought she was a mere serving wench and beneath his notice has done little to calm the situation

Author:  tilman [ Wed Jun 24, 2015 5:16 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Niccolo's Revenge

Il Giorno
"scribere la vera verita! "

translated overseas Edition


Deportes

GENOA: The team of Alemania Genoa beat Internationale Milan 13:1. All Goals (including the own goal against Genoa) where scored by the teams captain Pietro, the former Captain of Grim Grimaldies former 3rd Company own foot. Nobody dared come close to Pietro as if a certain Aura surrounded him.
The Milanese seemed confused, they claimed some piggish stench confused them every time they tried to tackle Pietro. Said Internationale Captain BB Johnes: "We didnt even know which side to kick the ball, it looked kinda round ?"

Militaria

PAVIA, flash news: The sinistre Milanese have broken the holy Italian peace! As the good grim Grimaldine forces are away to fend of the French to protect our Italian way of live, pizza, pasta and that, the Milanese have taken over the peaceful city of Pavia. Bad atrocities have been recorded said Pavian Major: "they have drunken all the olive oil those slickers". Obviously the Milanese Military had to sing praising songs for their Duke all day, so their throats have been totally dried out. How will the Italian Public react?

Politicia
Rome: The League of the Holy Trinity has put new Members filing their applications in an orderly row now. Sez Spokesman Dang Grimaldi: " We cannot have everybody in the League at once, half of Italy might be ok, opponents of the Milanese get priority treatment".
Rome: The Pope has issued a new knightly Order of Defenders of Rome, Brian Borgia being the Chairmen. Deeds in fending for the Italian Freedom against foreign or Milanese "protection" can be filed and will duly be rewarded with membership and further discounts on the services of the Order.
SIENNA: Public Unrest has been recorded as the Duke Dave "Pupeteer" Petrucci didnt react on the rightfull demands of the Borgia of Rome. With the Economy down, and Orvieto flooded, the future seems bleak for the Sienese. Will the Republicans depose the Duke in good time before he has sold all Public Companese to the Milanese including the local Wrench Service, or will WAR fall upon Italia? All good Italians are outraged and the Pope has demanded a public apology of the Petrucci and offered them to sponsor the local Christopher Street Day Parade as an overture of understanding. .
BARI: after inability to provide enough building materials for the Dukes exorbitant building program, the local Minister Geraldo Bruinlee has resigned. The Duke of Bari Claims the Milanese have caused the shortage by hoarding all available Stone.

EconomiA
MODENA: shortage of Olive Oil has been recorded in Modena after the supply from Pavia has dried out because of the Milanese agression(See above). But the Modenese have reacted and founded PEMEX (Projecto Expresso Modenese Exporto Xero) to import Maize Oil from their new overseas Dominion in Nueva Espagna (some call Mexico). The Brand is said to have a big economic future (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pemex).
ORVIETO: After the severe Flooding the Sienese have applied for help to all good Italians to stem the Water, the Sienese Economy is faltering. A Rescue Corps is assembled to bring relief. Brent, the Duke of Milan, after buying more shares of NESTLE Waters is reported as having said "we allready took over all public water wells in Sienna and pumping at a maximum and will sell water cheap to all interested Italians, the Sienese should be happy we care for their Water Problem". http://www.nestle.com/aboutus/ask-nestl ... california
VENICE: The Doge has demanded that no further fortifications should be built after all his valuable Obsidian was bought overpriced by Milanese Traders. "There should only be open and honest Battle, a shame on those hiding behind artificial Fortifications" the Doge Dude said. The other Dukes have begun to dig Lagunas the venetian style.

Advertisement
Building Specialist with proven Track record of economic building practices and excelling in PR searches new Projects. Please aply to G.B. in Bari.
END ADD

CulturA
Florence: In reaction to the latest news, the good Duke Augustin has sponsored the founding of the "All Italian Service Wrench League". The spokesperson Pietra the Pink had demanded to make no Difference between daughters of noble birth and ordinary service wrenches henceforth, all should be paid the very same respect. Vauban designed the AISWL new service costume, "pink is the new obsidian" he said.
Genoa: All Italian Glockenspiel Concert Contest was brilliantly won by the Grim Gimaldies 20 most beautiful Daughters. The 3rd Company of the Dukes own foot had to be dissolved after it was found collectively off guard in the opera instead of attending the Contest as ordered. Pietro the Pikeman was transferred to the football team for redemption.

GeographiA
BARI: After a public survey held by the Order of the Defenders of Rome has found out 80 % of Italians have no Clue where Bari is, the Order has sponsored a visiting scheme for voyages to Bari. Every good Italian visiting Bari gets 10 % Discount on the Orders services if he spends at least 400 Army points. The Modenese and Florentines have been asked to provide free transport for pilgrims of geography from the North. Precaution Notice: As Bari is half infidel, bring your arms to fend off the local Robbers. All for the good of knowlege!
Somewhere in the WEST INDIES: some more Islands have been discovered, the Pope decided to let the Modenese have exclusive Oil Trading rights there. Other Monopolies can be applied for at the Popes office, c./o. B. Borgia, the Tower, 1-17. Rome.

EducationE
MILAN: Still no relief for the shortage of teachers in Milan. The Price for every teacher by the duke doubled, dead or alive. Teachers union has formed a protest march on Venice to apply for protection of the Doge Dude.

Author:  awesum4 [ Thu Jul 02, 2015 2:52 pm ]
Post subject:  Re: Niccolo's Revenge

Dire La Verita

2nd June 1498


Stalemate in the North

Attempts by the League of the Holy Trinity to take control of Milan have run into a road-block. The forces of Venice, an associate member of the League, clashed with the defenders of Milan in the picturesque town of Brescia on the 14th of May. Details of the battle remain sketchy but it would appear that the Condottiere of both sides were reluctant to fully engage. No doubt Josh the Doge of Venice is a little unsettled that he alone attacked Milan despite the constant rhetoric emanating from Genoa over the previous months.


League treachery exposed

Dave "the Pupetteer" of Siena has renamed the League of the Holy Trinity as the League of Unholy Treachery after an unprovoked attack by Genoese forces into his territory. They were supposed to be defending Italy from Milan and the French, but their forces have moved South away from them both. Either Dang "the Grim" has a crap sense of direction or he is the most treacherous, slimy snake to have crawled out of the Genoese gutters in several centuries. The Forces of Sienna were in the south of their provinces confronting Brian "the cunning" invasion. At least Brian was honest and open and declared war as a gentleman would. However he showed his true colours and fled before our forces and we have liberated Civitaveccia from the Borgia yolk. Brian was unable to comment on these claims as he was in seclusion in his palace in Rome.


Pisa is natural Pig country

So claims Pieter de Soresino the new Genoese installed mayor of Pisa. The Duke has given me full backing to introduce modern German style efficiency into the farms of this area. For example we have found the playing glockenspiel music to the pigs during mating season increases both the size of the litters and the birthweight of the piglets. If all goes to plan within a few years "Pieter's Pisan Proscuttio" will be on every breakfast table in Italy



War of the Spanish Value erupts

Long simmering tensions between Bari and Florence have erupted into full scale war. The original dispute over the relative value of Spanish Soldiers compared to Italian has lead to bloodshed. The Florentine army (which claims 1 Spaniard is worth 3 Italians) invaded and attempted to capture the town of Termoli. There they were attacked by the forces of Bari (who claim the correct ratio is 1 to 4). The forces of Kerry "the Swarthy" of Bari surprised the Florentines by employing Swiss Mercenaries to lead the attack on the right. These quickly broke the Florentine left and then turned and attacked the rear of the remaining foot. So the correct ratio is definitely 1 to 4, but an argument is now developing over the value of Swiss pikemen.


Duke seeks cure

Duke Stuardo "the Mexican" of Modena has been spotted taking the waters at the spas of Reggio. Modenese spokesmen say the Duke is feeling much better and will no doubt make his presence felt in the Italian political scene over the coming weeks.


Book Review

The eagerly awaited new book by Sebastien Vauban "The Minor Fortifications of Italy" is now on sale at leading booksellers. Vauban's splitting of the forts in three categories according to materials and use is controversial to say the least. The timber and sod forts of the north such as Cremona, Este, Alessandria and Parma are so very different to the modern low stone built fort of Faenza, which is different again from the brick forts of Viterbro and Naples in the south. Each uses different construction techniques, and has a different feel and style.


Riddle of the Week

Q/ what's faster than a Brogia marching to war?

A/ a Borgia running from battle

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